After having dinner at Arlin Restaurant, I strolled around the streets of Suzhou at night with Le Yao, carrying my guitar. The fallen leaves, cold wind, shadows, towering buildings, all painted the city in the hues of late autumn.
I lit a cigarette, enjoying the hazy smoke after a satisfying meal. I found myself frequently looking back at this city. It was only when I was about to leave that I realized I didn’t hate it as much as I thought. In fact, I felt a bit reluctant to leave. After all, it had witnessed my youth, my life, and even my love. Here, I understood that longing for someone was loneliness. Here, I learned that if the affection between two people evolved into marriage, it was called love. If only memories remained, it was just a legend, a lonely and bitter legend.
Feeling tired, Le Yao and I sat on a bench by the street, each lost in our own thoughts. Finally, I asked her, “How about you? How have you been lately?”
Le Yao shook her head in confusion, “Same as always, not great, but I’ve never given up trying.”
I nodded, not knowing how to respond. I understood the meaning behind her words. When she said she never gave up, she was also questioning why I had.
After a brief silence, Le Yao asked me, “What are your plans for life after returning to Xuzhou?”
I took a deep drag of my cigarette, pondered for a while before answering, “If my dad is willing to arrange a job for me at his workplace, that would be great. If not, I’ll find a job myself, find a woman to spend my life with, and then wait for life’s inevitable end.”
“Don’t plan your life so far ahead. Life is full of uncertainties, isn’t it?”
“I’d rather see the end of my life at a glance.”
Le Yao chuckled, “That’s why you fantasize about a crystal-clear city as your mental refuge.”
“Yes, only when it’s crystal clear can you see the farthest without any obstacles.”
“Maybe we really are different kinds of people,” Le Yao sighed.
“Yes, the island with smoke you fantasize about requires swimming across a sea to reach. So compared to crystal clear, you have to experience more.”
Le Yao looked at me as if she had suddenly understood something. After a long while, she said, “Have you ever felt that we are like two stars destined not to appear together? I’m at the edge of the sea, you’re at the horizon, echoing each other from afar but never getting closer?”
I didn’t respond, just looked into the distance. In a daze, it seemed like I could really see that city in the sky and a beach echoing each other from afar, but they could never get closer.
That night, Le Yao and I hugged and said goodbye. Perhaps after leaving Suzhou, we would go further and further in the directions we each hoped for. Eventually, we might forget the night we spent together. Perhaps life is made up of countless forgettings, and in the end, we forget everything in death.
……
Three days passed. Apart from eating, sleeping, and using the bathroom, the only thing I did was show potential tenants the single apartment I was currently renting.
That afternoon, I showed the apartment to three potential tenants, but none of them decided to rent for various reasons. The last to come was a couple who had just graduated from university.
The couple held hands and looked around the room. Finally, they seemed satisfied. The man asked me, “How do you plan to rent this room?”
“One month’s deposit, three months’ rent in advance, a total of 5200 RMB.”
The man and woman looked at each other and whispered a few words. Then the man said to me, “If you can round down the 200 RMB, we’ll take the room.”
“Kid, 200 RMB is not a small amount. If I weren’t in a hurry to leave, I wouldn’t give you this price.” I said without any room for negotiation. Of course, this was the truth. I had rented the room for 5600 RMB and had only lived there for less than a week.
The man and woman whispered again. This time the woman said to me, “5200 is fine, but we want to move in tonight. Is that okay?”
I weighed the options and said, “That’s fine. If there are no other issues, we can sign the contract now.”
The man and woman nodded to indicate there were no problems. I immediately went into the room to get the pre-prepared sublease contract.
While they were looking at the contract, my phone rang again. I instinctively thought it was another call to view the room. When I took out my phone from my pocket, I was surprised to see it was Mi Cai, who I hadn’t contacted for several days.
This call stirred up a mix of emotions. I had once bullied this woman without any limits, but it was also because of her that I lost the career prospects I had fought so hard for in this city. Perhaps we were destined to be enemies, even though there was a brief period when we were friends.
I stepped outside and answered the call. Surprisingly, both of us were waiting for the other to speak first.
In the silence, I couldn’t help but say, “You called me, why aren’t you saying anything?”
Mi Cai seemed startled by my voice, “Ah!… Sorry, I was looking at a document. I didn’t realize the call had connected!””Oh, you seem quite busy. Aren’t you just a building manager at Zhuo Mei? It can’t be that hectic, can it?” I blurted out, fully aware that Mi Cai is the CEO of Zhuo Mei.
Mi Cai didn’t mind my nonsense, she smiled and said, “Yes, it’s quite busy, but it’s almost over.”
“Oh, what’s up? Why did you call me? Is there a leak in the room you’ve taken over?”
“No, I got off work early today. Didn’t you say I could come over for dinner?”
I was a bit surprised. I did say that to Mi Cai, but I didn’t expect her to actually come. Could we really become friends after we stopped fighting over that room?
Seeing that I didn’t respond, Mi Cai asked again, “Can’t I? Or are you not confident in your cooking skills?”
I snapped back to reality and asked Mi Cai, “What do you think of my dad’s cooking?”
“It’s great!”
“Ever heard of the saying ‘like father, like son’? Come over tonight, I’ll show you my skills, so you won’t think I’m good for nothing!”
“Okay, I’ll be there in a bit.”
“Alright, buy whatever you want to eat from the supermarket. I don’t provide ingredients.”
I thought Mi Cai would call me stingy, but she just said “okay” and hung up.
……
I returned to the room where the young couple had already reviewed the contract and signed their names.
I took the contract and said to them in a negotiating tone, “I have a friend coming over for dinner later, so I can’t move out tonight. I’ll give you a 200 yuan discount as compensation, okay?”
The couple started whispering to each other again. I was speechless. They really respected each other, discussing every trivial matter.
After waiting for a while, they finally made a decision. The man said to me, “Make it 400!”
I frowned and said, “Young man, be reasonable. 200 yuan is enough for you two to stay in a hotel for a night, and you’ll still have some change for a late-night snack.”
“The contract is signed. We now have the right to use this room. If you don’t give us a 400 yuan discount, we won’t agree to your request.”
“Damn it…” I blurted out a curse.
The couple seemed startled by my outburst, looking at me with fear.
I laughed and said, “If you two are so timid, don’t try to play hardball!”
The man finally plucked up the courage to say, “It’s your fault for not giving us a 200 yuan discount earlier…”
I hate whiners. I interrupted him impatiently, “Alright, stop arguing. 400, right? I agree.”
The man exchanged a glance with the woman, as if they had just struck a great deal. He happily took out money from his bag, counted 4800 yuan, and handed it to me.
I gave them a copy of the sublease contract and a key. They left, leaving me somewhat amused. I, Zhao Yang, was actually tricked by someone, and it was a whiner!
Without thinking too much, I picked up the mop and started cleaning the room, preparing for Mi Cai’s arrival. This was another chance given by heaven for me to say goodbye to Mi Cai, after Le Yao.