Jian Wei’s expression gradually turned painful. She looked at me for a long time before finally retorting, “Look down on you?… If I looked down on you, would I have fallen out with my family, run away from Shanghai to Suzhou to live with you, eating instant noodles and fried rice every day, wearing clothes bought from online flea markets… Of course, none of this matters, because I willingly did it all, even finding a kind of joy in sharing our hardships!”

I felt suffocated, as if time had been disregarded and I was back to those days three years ago…

That year, we huddled together with a hot water bottle for warmth in the winter, watching TV while sharing a box of chips. Yes, I was that poor back then, unable to afford a room with air conditioning, and without spare money to take her to a movie. But she still followed me, listening to me play the guitar and sing that song “Elopement”, moved to tears.

I tried hard to control my emotions, and after a while, I said to Jian Wei beside me, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked you that… But why did you break up with me?”

Jian Wei looked somewhat dazed, and after a long time, she choked out, “We both made mistakes, but mine were more outrageous, so outrageous that we had to break up…”

“What mistake?” I asked impatiently, finally afraid that there might be a misunderstanding between us.

Jian Wei shook her head and said, “Don’t ask anymore. We’ve been broken up for three years. All the truths have become meaningless with the passing of these three years. If you insist on knowing, it will only make us relive the pain!”

“I’m not afraid of pain, I want the truth…” I gritted my teeth and said.

“Why didn’t you want it three years ago?… Now I’m with Xiang Chen, and we might get married soon. Do you think it’s necessary?”

“I…” I suddenly couldn’t go on. Reason told me that Jian Wei was right. The truth, for us now, would bring nothing but pain.

In the silence, the cold wind stirred up waves on the river, causing the neon reflections on the water to tremble restlessly. My mood became agitated with the irregular trembling.

Jian Wei finally whispered to me, “Because the world is so dirty, we can find the most beautiful wish… Zhao Yang, I will always silently bless you, until you find that most beautiful wish!”

I couldn’t understand what Jian Wei was trying to convey to me. I wanted to ask more, but she had already stood up and left, leaving me with her most resolute silhouette, as if telling me that all the past would eventually be drowned in the river of time, and there was no need to delve into anything.

But what exactly is the most beautiful wish I should pursue? Is it the city in the sky, or the beautiful woman with long hair in the city?

I couldn’t determine the answer. The night suddenly became pitch black. I should go back. Because only when I can’t see the dawn, can I see my most sincere dream. And my dream is definitely not in this moat flowing with falsehood.

…

When I returned home, I nervously opened the door of the house, but was surprised to find a pair of women’s winter boots on the shoe rack. Then I saw Mi Cai sitting on the sofa reading a document. I suddenly remembered the unpleasant incident at CC’s restaurant a few hours ago. Was she here to confront me?

I went to Mi Cai’s side and asked, “Why are you here?”

“My house, can’t I come?”

“Didn’t you rent it to me?”

Mi Cai put down the document and looked up at me, “I did rent it to you, but did you pay me the rent?”

“You said last time that I didn’t need to pay, just buy some potted plants for the house. What, are you going back on your word?”

Mi Cai looked around indifferently and said, “So where are the potted plants you bought?”

“I haven’t had time to buy them yet, but I will definitely go buy them.”

“No time? I think you have plenty of time, even enough to play racing games.”

I finally confirmed that Mi Cai was here to pick a fight with me because of Wei Ran. I was immediately annoyed and said, “I like to play racing games, I don’t like to buy potted plants, so what?”

“So you’re just a rude, untrustworthy scoundrel who will never change.”

Mi Cai’s sarcasm made me feel even more aggrieved. I looked at her for a while and said angrily, “I’m a scoundrel, I’m rude, and your friend is a gentleman, right?”

“Why do you have to compare yourself to him?”

Yeah! Why do I have to compare myself to him? I suddenly felt a bit guilty, “You mind your own business… Tell me why you’re here.”

“I let Wei Ran live in my place, where else can I go if not here?”

Mi Cai’s answer stunned me. Did this mean that Mi Cai minded living under the same roof with Wei Ran, but didn’t mind living with me?I immediately asked, “You don’t mind living with me, do you?”

“I do mind. So, you’ll be staying in a hotel later. You’ll have to stay in a hotel for the next few days.”

I felt embarrassed and even more annoyed at my own wishful thinking. I walked over to Mi Cai, got close to her face, and angrily said, “Why should I? Why don’t you ask your friend to stay in a hotel?… Let me tell you, I’m not going anywhere.”

“You…” Mi Cai was too angry to continue.

The situation quickly turned in my favor. I confidently said, “Don’t struggle in vain. Everything should be reasonable. You’ve already rented the house to me, so you don’t have the right to use it now. As for the potted plant, you didn’t specify when I had to buy it. I’ll get it tomorrow. So, whether you can stay here tonight depends on my consent.”

“So, you want me to be homeless?”

I smiled and said, “You won’t be homeless. You’re so rich, even if you leave, you’ll stay in a five-star hotel. But I’m different. If you really kick me out, I’ll either stay in a small inn or be truly homeless.”

Mi Cai’s tone finally softened a bit, “Don’t make yourself sound so pitiful.”

“Pity isn’t something you say or pretend. Don’t you know how I’ve been living since we met?”

Mi Cai fell silent, seemingly recalling how poor I had been since we met. After a while, she finally said to me, “Then I’ll go to the hotel.” She then picked up her handbag from the sofa.

I snatched the handbag from her and put it back on the sofa, “It’s late, can we stop this nonsense? It’s not like we haven’t lived together before. Go wash up and sleep. Don’t you have to go to Shanghai tomorrow?”

“How do you know I’m going to Shanghai tomorrow?”

“You told me this morning. Go to sleep. I’ll make you breakfast tomorrow morning. It’s better than staying in a hotel.”

Mi Cai looked at me, nodded obediently, then went back to her room to change clothes and then to the bathroom to wash up.

I was exhausted from the night’s events. I sat on the sofa, lit a cigarette to ease my physical and mental fatigue, completely forgetting that Mi Cai was still in the house. If she saw me smoking in the living room, she would scold me again!