Jian Wei's revelation and consolation plunged me into silence. After a long pause, I said, "I acknowledge what you've said. If we were truly strangers, I'd be overjoyed to help you turn the tide. But we do have an unavoidable past, and humans are, after all, creatures ruled by emotions. With my current understanding, I can't help but care."
"In the end, you still lack confidence in your own talent, otherwise you wouldn't care about these things."
"Talent?… Is such a vague term appropriate for this situation?… Can so-called talent really represent everything?"
Jian Wei's expression turned somber, yet she managed a smile and said, "Indeed, the word 'talent' is too hollow… I once thought that after graduating from college, we could start an advertising agency together. With your talent and my father's resources, you could have made a name for yourself in the advertising world, but…"
"But the only one who recognized my talent was you, Jian Wei, not your father. In this society, tangible resources are far more important than abstract talent. After facing the harsh reality, what shattered were the dreams of both of us."
Jian Wei fell silent, and I felt a heartache in her silence. This was the first time she had shared her past plans with me. Back then, we were too isolated and powerless. Without her father's support, we couldn't possibly start a company. Even the advertising agency Jian Wei runs now was established with the network she built during her three years studying in the United States, along with investments she attracted and her savings over the years.
Jian Wei bit her lip, stubbornly holding back tears that were about to fall, and said with a choked voice, "If only my father had given us a chance back then, we wouldn't have ended up… like this now. I really hate it!"
Her words filled me with regret and even more pain. If Jian Wei's father had given us a chance back then, I, deeply in love, would have abandoned my pride for her sake, seized the opportunity, and strived for success. Perhaps I would have achieved something, and Jian Wei wouldn't have had to go far away to America. By now, we would surely be married and might even have had our own children. Just the thought of it felt wonderful.
After a while, I finally asked Jian Wei, "Did you have another argument with Xiang Chen?"
"Why do you ask?"
"People often reminisce about the past when they're dissatisfied with the present, and clearly, you are now."
"I've never been satisfied."
"Who has ever truly been satisfied? Learn to adapt to the present… just like me. I don't want to be cooped up here either, but I can't go anywhere else. It's better to turn all this dissatisfaction into motivation for change. Maybe things will gradually get better."
Jian Wei nodded, "Zhao Yang, I'm glad to see you've matured. You'll definitely get better and better."
I looked at Jian Wei but remained silent, unsure whether I had truly matured or if I still appeared childish in someone else's eyes.
***
After leaving Jian Wei's guest room, I didn't feel like resting. I wanted to take a walk to clear my head and think about how to renovate the inn. It's no exaggeration to say that, small as it is, the inn carries the dreams I've pieced back together after being shattered. I refuse to let failure be branded upon this place in Xitang.
It was already ten o'clock at night, and the streets had become deserted and quiet. In the stillness, I could see far, even spotting a couple kissing at the end of a bridge. But I didn't envy them, for in Xitang, such scenes were too common, and their frequency had numbed me.
I continued to wander forward, and on the opposite bank of the river, a figure was swaying in the same rhythm as me. I glanced over and saw her—the beautiful woman in red I hadn't seen for days.
I called out to her, "Hey, still out for a walk this late?"
"So are you."
I chuckled, "Thought you didn't want to talk to me!"
"I'll make an exception since you sang a song for me."
"You're quite arrogant!"
We kept talking but didn't stop walking, continuing on our way.
"If you think I'm arrogant, why bother talking to me?"
"There's no one else around but you."
"Your mouth sure can't stay idle."
We kept walking on opposite sides of the river, and finally, there was a small bridge ahead. I crossed the bridge towards her side, but she also crossed, coming to the side I had just left. So after exchanging places, we still walked forward, separated by the stream.
After a while, I called out to her again, "Which inn are you staying at now?"
"What's it to you?"
"Of course, it matters. I've taken over an inn here and am worried about business. Since you have to stay somewhere, why not stay at our inn?"
"So you're a tout!"
I was speechless and after a moment said, "I'm running a legitimate business. How can you call me a tout?"
"What's the name of your inn?"
"Inn."
"What name?"
"It's called Inn!"
"You're being deliberately mysterious!"
I smiled helplessly, "If you don't want to stay, fine, but why belittle my inn?"
"It's not that I don't want to stay; it's just that I'm leaving Xitang tomorrow. What difference does it make where I stay now?"
"Oh, I see. Well, I hope that after you leave Xitang, you'll find some happiness."
"Thank you."
"You're welcome. Actually, I do hope that Xitang will become a sanctuary for healing heartbreaks, so that when we leave here, we can start a new life, a new self."
She nodded and waved at me, then turned left into an alley at the next fork, and her figure quickly merged into the night.
I let out a deep breath, my thoughts once again turning to Mi Cai. Although I spoke lightly, if I really left Xitang and one day encountered her on some street corner, would I still be that supposedly renewed self?
***
After wandering a little longer, I returned to the inn, only to find a red Q7 parked at the door. As I approached, I saw it had a Suzhou license plate.
After Wei Ran, Mi Cai had finally arrived.
Why did I use the word "finally"? Was it that my subconscious also believed she would definitely come?
Yes, she was bound to come because we still hadn't uttered the words "break up."
I smoked a cigarette before entering the inn. Amidst the emotional turmoil, I looked around but didn't see Mi Cai. However, Tongzi excitedly told me, "Brother Yang, our inn has welcomed a second guest!… She's so beautiful, indescribably so, even more beautiful than Le Yao… You know, if our inn attracts beauties so easily, we should rename it 'Beauty Inn'!"
Tongzi's description confirmed that the second guest was undoubtedly Mi Cai, but my heart sank at her beauty because only I understood how much pressure and pain her beauty and grace had brought me…
"Where is she?"
"I've already arranged a room for her. Oh, and she asked about you. Told me to let her know when you're back… Brother Yang, who exactly are you? How do you know so many unbelievably beautiful women?"
"Using 'unbelievably beautiful' and 'beautiful women' is redundant."
Tongzi chuckled and then picked up the phone next to the computer, saying, "You're back, I need to call her room right away to let her know."
"Wait."
I rushed over to Tongzi and pressed down the hand holding the phone.
Proofreader & Editor: Peter Pan