Mi Cai’s relentless gaze, demanding an answer, made me feel suffocated. I lit a cigarette for myself, and after half of it was smoked, I extinguished it in the ashtray. Then, I steeled my heart and said to Mi Cai, “This advertising deal was negotiated for Jian Wei and Jinding Real Estate… I…”

“You don’t need to continue.”

“I want to say.”

Mi Cai shook her head, tears welling in her eyes, “Zhao Yang, I really doubt my position in your heart. You keep saying you care about me, but what about it? You’re willing to come to Suzhou to manage a bar for Le Yao, willing to negotiate business for Jian Wei’s advertising company, but you’re not willing to work at Zhuomei…”

“…It’s really not what you think.”

“You tell me, how do I think? And tell me, if this happened to other women, would they be indifferent?”

I sighed, lit another cigarette in frustration, but suddenly found myself at a loss for words, completely unsure of how to explain.

Mi Cai turned and walked towards her room, and then I heard the sound of her packing her clothes.

I suddenly felt tired, too exhausted to stop her. I just stared blankly at the TV cabinet, but next to it, I saw a guitar standing upright.

I extinguished the cigarette in my hand again, then walked over to the cabinet and picked up the guitar, examining it.

This exquisitely crafted guitar was clearly custom-made. I suddenly understood that this was the guitar Mi Cai had mentioned she wanted to give me a few days ago.

On the back of the guitar, I saw a pattern of a rainbow and a sunrise. I knew, the sunrise was me, the rainbow was her. Although our names were not engraved on the guitar, it was more meaningful than having our names on it.

My heart felt as if it had been thrown into chili water, both painful and burning. I lifted my head, trying hard to steady my breath, then put down the guitar and gently pushed open Mi Cai’s room door.

She had already packed all the clothes she had once left here and refused to take away into a large suitcase. My heart felt as if it was being hollowed out bit by bit, then I felt panic and suffocation, as if I had fallen into the sorrow of love again.

I finally couldn’t control myself, took two steps to Mi Cai’s side, and then held her tightly, not letting her continue packing. Every time a piece of clothing was missing from the wardrobe, my heart felt as if it was being hollowed out a bit more. I couldn’t bear this empty pain.

Mi Cai struggled, “Let me go.”

“Don’t go, okay?”

“Get away from me.”

I held her even tighter, already choking, “Don’t go, don’t go… There are some difficulties I don’t know how to explain to you. I’m stupid, I really don’t know how to describe… But, I love you… I really do. If you leave, I’ll be empty, just a shell!”

Mi Cai bit her lip tightly, tears welling in her eyes.

I kissed her without any hesitation. She resisted fiercely, but gradually responded, awkwardly.

I couldn’t control myself anymore, carried her to the bed, unbuttoned her clothes one by one. Her body was exposed in front of me. In my madness, I pulled at her pajama bottoms, but my face inadvertently touched hers. The feeling of her tear-soaked face made me sober up instantly. I gradually stopped my movements, then lifted my head to look at her.

Her face was full of tears, but she turned her head away, refusing to look at me. This scene quickly extinguished my physical desire. I looked at her helplessly, and after a long while, I said, “I’m sorry… I’m sorry!”

Mi Cai buttoned up her clothes, looked at me for a long time, “Zhao Yang, let’s both calm down, okay?”

“How long do we need to calm down? I’m afraid you won’t come back once you calm down.”

“I’m more afraid of you getting entangled with so many women… This is not the love I want!”

“I don’t want to get entangled with them either, but… reality…”

“What about reality?”

“Reality… makes me need that money.”

“Why didn’t you tell me if you needed money?”

“Don’t you understand? What I want is money earned by my own ability, not someone else’s gift!”

Mi Cai shook her head in pain, “Now we even have obstacles in communication… Don’t say anymore, the more we talk, the deeper our misunderstandings… Let’s calm down.”

I tilted my head back, not letting the warmth at the corner of my eyes turn into tears. But a wave of overwhelming helplessness welled up in my heart. I was powerless to bind Mi Cai, to make her stay here.

…

I thought: I will never forget the sight of her dragging her suitcase away that night. Because that suitcase was not only filled with her clothes, but also my soul.

…I sat alone in her room until dawn, gradually realizing that the most unpredictable thing in this world is love. We can indeed fantasize about love being beautiful, but reality always paints it black, causing us to lose ourselves in the muddy flow of love.

Now, all I can do is cling to her words, “Let’s cool down, cool down,” because she hasn’t said “break up,” she hasn’t truly sentenced me to death!

Exhausted and weary, I fell asleep on Mi Cai’s bed, but her residual warmth had completely dissipated!

……

I slept until noon, then wandered around the room like a soulless body, standing for a while, sitting for a while, and then taking a few steps.

It wasn’t until the ringtone of the phone in the room sounded that I rushed into the room, praying that it was a call from Mi Cai, but it was Jian Wei who called.

I lit a cigarette and answered the phone, not saying a word, just waiting for her to speak first.

“Zhao Yang, I’m sorry… I originally put the bank card in your pocket, but Zhao Ke (the person who drove me home) was afraid you would lose it when you were drunk, so he gave it to Mi Cai for safekeeping…”

I interrupted Jian Wei, asking, “If Xiang Chen knew I was helping you with your business, would he be unhappy?”

Without much thought, Jian Wei said, “What right does he have to interfere with my work?”

“Why do you care that Zhao Ke gave the bank card to Mi Cai instead of me? We only interacted because of work, right?”

Jian Wei finally breathed a sigh of relief, saying, “As long as it didn’t affect you two, that’s good.”

“Um… If there’s nothing else, I’m hanging up.”

“Okay, bye.”

I hung up Jian Wei’s call, and then saw an unopened message. I casually opened it and saw that it was sent by Jian Wei last night. She told me that the bank card was in my pocket and even included the password.

She didn’t lie. All my troubles now are just because of Zhao Ke’s unnecessary actions. But can I blame him? After all, he meant well. So at this moment, I prefer to believe that this is a tribulation that Mi Cai and I must go through on our journey of love.

But why can Jian Wei say that Xiang Chen has no right to interfere with her work, and I can’t say the same to Mi Cai?

It seems that love is never equal. Xiang Chen and I are the weaker ones in love, while Mi Cai and Jian Wei are the favored ones.

……

Under the setting sun at dusk, I held the guitar that Mi Cai had customized for me and came to the riverside. Looking at the sunrise and rainbow pattern on the guitar, I suddenly missed her. I wanted her to be by my side, listening to me play a song for her. But it was just a wishful thinking. She had been tolerating me for a long time. This incident was just a fuse that ignited long-term conflicts. But was I really wrong? I, who was in the situation, was really not sure.

The wind brought the scent of spring again, and the willow trees by the river also broke through the shackles of winter and sprouted spring buds…

The vibrant spring in front of me made me not want to think about anything else, just staring at the rainbow and the sunrise on the guitar, lost in thought.

I thought: The beauty of the rainbow is because it has experienced the baptism of wind and rain, the brilliance of the sunrise is because it has broken through the shackles of the night. She is the rainbow, I am the sunrise, we are destined to be together. The temporary separation now is just because of the wind and rain and the night that hinder us. One day, I will see her beauty, and she will bask in my glory!